Growth. Sometimes we allow people in our lives that stunt our growth. It can be a friend, family member, or a lover. Sometimes relationships sour and they no longer add value to our lives. When this happens, it’s time to move on. Move forward. It’s unfortunate, it sucks actually. Above anything else, it is really hard. Especially if this person has made a major impact in your life.
I know what it’s like to keep a toxic person in your life out of comfort or guilt. It has happened more commonly with breakups for me. I know what it’s like to keep holding on when the relationship/friendship is dead. I’ve been through it a time or two, and I wanted to share some tips on how to move forward.
No Talking To or About Them
It is a no brainer that in order to detox someone out of your world, you must stop speaking to them. But you must take it a step further and stop speaking ABOUT them too. When you stop speaking about them, it will be much easier to stop thinking about them. Whether it’s a rant to your bestie about the bullshit they put you through or a quick quip about their favorite restaurant. Just stop. If you are making a conscious effort to detox this person out of your life, you have to stop speaking them into it. I am a firm believer that we speak things into existence. If you keep bringing them up in your life, they will always be apart of it. Trust me, I know it’s hard. Very hard. And it will hurt, however a detox is a cleanse. And the quickest way to take back your power, is to stop letting someone take up space inside your head that you don’t want to be there. So as soon as you stop talking about them, the quicker you will stop thinking about them. And if they do cross your mind, which they will, just send them a little love and light and go on about your business. They are no longer your concern.
No Social Media
This is a MUST. Block, delete, unfollow, unfriend, whatever. Take the extra steps to remove yourself from their social media circle and them from yours. I know, I know. You want to be nosy, and see who and what their doing. DON’T! That will be completely counterproductive to the growth you feel you will gain from removing them from your life. This directly connects to my first point. If you’re spending time checking in on their social media, you are focusing on them and not you. And we aren’t checking for them.
Surround yourself with loved ones
Showing one person the door in your life, doesn’t mean you have to escort everyone else out. Spend time with people you do feel bring value into your life. Surround yourself with people you love, and who love you. Put positive energy into the people who support you, and you will receive that energy right back.
Go watch Creed and get focused. Seriously, use this time to focus on you and your goals. What’s a better distraction than your own business. Been wanting to hit the gym more? Do it. Keep putting off learning a new hobby? Now is the time to get started. By focusing on positive goals you set for yourself, there is less opportunity to focus on the things and people hold you back.
Don’t Feel Guilty
My last tip is don’t feel guilty for one second. I’m all about growth. If there is something or someone stopping you from growing, they have got to go. And you should not feel bad about that. You are allowed to focus on you and your own well being without feeling bad about it. Once you realized you were ready to move forward, that was the moment you committed to growth. Take all the people who want to grow with you, leave all the rest behind.